以愛為旗

Many people asked me about my story with David. Here is how it started....

I met David on April 7th 2002, he was giving a testimony in my church in San Francisco. When I first saw him I thought that he was very cute. He was smiling the whole time & then his smile caught my heart. Later, after service, I approached him with anxiety & nervousness & asked him if he could e-mail me his testimony in English. He did, although it did take him many days, for he forgot. Then we started to correspond through e-mail & MSN Messenger. At first all we talked about was God.
I liked him a lot since the first time I met him. Ever since that day I prayed to God. I told him that I liked David. God answered. He told me that David is very precious to Him (God). I was so sad, I felt that I was not good enough.I even prayed to God that David would e-mail me. I used to run back home and turn on my computer just to see if he sent me any mail. I had a friend named Jessie who was in Taiwan and I didn't have her phone number. Someone told me that she uses MSN Messenger sometimes. So, I downloaded the program. When I finish my install the first window that popped up was David's information. He uses MSN Messenger to talk to his friends all the time. His Hotmail account automatically set me up as a contact after he sent me his testimony. I was so surprised when he popped up on MSN one day while I was reading Isaiah 55 3-5. This Bible verse touched my heart and it reminded me about David. All this time he was always in my prayers. For I asked God to transform me into someone that David would love. At that time we have been already talking to each on MSN (internet message centre) but we didn't talk very much at first. But, the more I chatted with him the more I started to like him. At that time we didn't say anything personal, we usually stuck to God as the main topic. A month or two after we have been chatting online I started to feel that I was falling in love with him and I begin to pray to God even more. I was so afraid. So afraid that David didn't like me. I was also scared that I was not good enough for him. I started to feel I had too many sins and that I didn't deserve him . I thought, "I am a sinner. How can I ask God what I want?" God does love me. I asked for His forgiveness & He forgave me. He remembers how many times that I had cried out for this relationship to be His will and how many times I cried out to our Father, "Please... If he is not the one then take him away from me." I felt that I had so many sins from my past relationships. I was scared to get hurt and I was scared of hurting someone again.

At this time I knew I liked David allot but at the same time I didn't want to hurt him. I was so confused but I also knew that I have grown up so much in Christ in this short time. I didn't want to hurt him because I never knew how to "LOVE" the way God would want me to love someone. But, God's Spirit has lead me to face my sins from my past relationships. I asked God's forgiveness over and over again. I kept condemning myself & making myself feel trapped by my past sins until I went to a conference in San Jose 3 weeks ago. The pastors there told me that God already forgiven my sins but I hadn't forgiven myself yet. I now know that that it was the enemy (devil) that tried to make me lie to myself. After that conference, I felt God's Holy Spirit come alive around me & in me. Since then God has answered all my prayers. no matter how big or small He would give me an answer to. Then recently God answered a very important prayer for me. "David is the one for me." Many months ago, before we met in San Francisco, we both made a list. In this list we described to God what we were looking for in a partner. The list I made was very descriptive but the one David had was 8 pages long! All the things that I wanted in a man described him. Many things came to past for David & his list as well. On Friday morning at around 3am I told him a story that I wrote, in this story I said that, "I had a very special friend. This special friend always understands me spiritually. He pushes me to grow in my walk with Christ. He worries about me when I take the wrong path with God's word. When I am sad he will just pray for me. When I am happy, he will praise the Lord for & with me. He just wants me to be happy with Jesus."
At that moment, I questioned myself if he knew that I was talking about him. I felt that shouldn't hide it anymore. So, I told him, "You are the one. So unreal. So perfect. So smart. You are so sweet, and so lovely."

David asked me if I had been praying for this & I said, "Yes...Yes I did."

He told me that he has been praying for this as well but the one thing that he wanted most from God was that "she" had to tell him that she was the one for him. He also wanted his parents to approve without hesitation." And they did the next day when he called them to tell them about me. This guaranteed the seal of approval that he was looking for from God.


In these past few weeks, I started to answer something about what David was looking for on his "8 page list". He had been praying for a long time to God & asking Him everyday to "Make his future wife fall in love with Jesus more so tomorrow than she did today." And God has been doing this to me & I guess David started noticing this in me. He noticed that I was, in fact, falling deeper & deeper in love with Jesus everyday. I know this to be true for he told me this a couple of days ago. Many more things happened as well in the past month & a half to let me feel that he is the one. Our soul's are linked to each other and this is the most important thing to me next to putting God first in everything that I do. (I'll tell you if you want to know more, call me) God has transformed me from what I used to be. The old is dead & the new is here. I am a new creation. David is a new creation. God has put us together & we know it! In the eyes of the world they think that we are crazy. I think we are too...Crazy in love with Jesus & crazy in love with each other. We don't deserve each other but by God's grace & mercy has put us together. David is the one that is going to be sharing my life with God. He is not "just" a boy-friend. He is also: my friend, my brother, my future husband, my spiritual partner, & my prayer partner & more. I don't want to limit God on whatever blessings that he has for us. We believe that God will show us our life. We believe that we will be his best warriors to set the captives free. We also will be the best servants that we can to the Lord. David is my dream and David is the grace that God gives to me. Praise to the Lord! I never felt so peaceful in a relationship until now. God gave him to me, to teach me, and to heal my pain from the past relationship. And as my promise to the Lord, I will always love David and be his best partner in Christ too!